Buckle up, Buttercup!
You know the old caveat, "Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it"? I have always known it to be true, but I would also add that wishes take many forms. It is not just what you think about when blowing out the candles on your birthday cake. It is not just the thoughts that you have when you wish on a falling star. It is not even just the things you picture when you are trying to imagine your ideal life. Those are some of the ways you wish, but you also wish with your words, every day, even when you don't realize that you are.
Well, I have had this hammered home to me in the past month, in ways that I never could have anticipated...and I am still a little dazed.
First of all, let me say, I have always been the sort of person who rarely makes big changes easily. There is usually a ton of bricks involved, and they are usually falling on my head. So that piece of the equation shouldn't have surprised me. But I think that the weight, velocity, and ferocity of this particular brick delivery really threw me for a loop.
Here's the story:
For quite some time now, I have been dissatisfied with my job. When I look back on my journal entries from the past few months, I don't really have many positive things to say about going to work each day. Every morning was a struggle for me, to whip up the enthusiasm to leave my house. So when people would ask me about my job, my answer was most often preceded with a sigh, and then a justification of why I was still doing something that was sapping my soul of the joy that it so desperately wanted to hold onto. So, basically, every day (probably multiple times in a day) I was wishing that I wasn't doing what it was I was doing for a living....simply through my attitude and the way I was talking about my job.
Fast forward to the afternoon before I was to leave for Mexico, to spend a glorious week with my family celebrating the holidays. I got a phone call telling me that my services were no longer needed by my employer. Out of the blue! I mean, being a nanny, you know that your job will eventually have an end date. But, typically, there is some sort of notice before you are cut loose. Not this time. One day I was employed, the next...not so much. Now, fortunately for me, I boarded a plane early the next morning for a tropical paradise, where I was able to let the waves of the ocean wash away the stress of that experience. But even though the stress was tamed, the reality was the same...I was unemployed. (Remember when I was wishing that I didn't have to go to work? BAM! Wish granted!)
I had a wonderful time in Mexico. It was sunny, it was WARM. I got to spend an entire week without shoes on, swimming in the WARM, clear waters of the Pacific ocean. Every night I fell asleep, on the WARM beach, to the soothing roar of the ocean waves. (Are you sensing a theme here?) It was fantastic. On the day that I was leaving, it was 90F outside. When we got on the plane, the pilot was going through his update about the flying conditions and all, and when he got to the info about Minneapolis he said, "Skies are clear in Minneapolis, and the temperature on the ground is...well, let's just say that it is 100 degrees colder than where we just left." NOOOOO! Let me off the plane! I want to go back! Yep, it was the coldest day of the year in Minneapolis, and that was what I was facing upon my return. By the time we landed, it was -15F outside, and quite the shock to my system when I got off the train and started walking to my car. Thankfully, my car started without hesitation, and I was on the final leg of the journey home.
Home. Where my wonderful bed was waiting for me. Home, where I could make myself a cup of tea before heading for bed. Home, where I could see my breath when I was standing in the living room. Home, where my dishes were frozen to the sink. Home, where the water in my toilet was a huge ice cube....WAIT, WHAT?! Yep, my boiler had gone out while I was in paradise, and the temperature inside my house was 22F. Everything in my house was frozen! EVERYTHING! My faucets, my toilet, even the jug of apple cider that was on my kitchen counter. Frozen solid. I had never seen anything like it. Crazy.
Why do I bring this up?
First of all, let me say, I have always been the sort of person who rarely makes big changes easily. There is usually a ton of bricks involved, and they are usually falling on my head. So that piece of the equation shouldn't have surprised me. But I think that the weight, velocity, and ferocity of this particular brick delivery really threw me for a loop.
Here's the story:
For quite some time now, I have been dissatisfied with my job. When I look back on my journal entries from the past few months, I don't really have many positive things to say about going to work each day. Every morning was a struggle for me, to whip up the enthusiasm to leave my house. So when people would ask me about my job, my answer was most often preceded with a sigh, and then a justification of why I was still doing something that was sapping my soul of the joy that it so desperately wanted to hold onto. So, basically, every day (probably multiple times in a day) I was wishing that I wasn't doing what it was I was doing for a living....simply through my attitude and the way I was talking about my job.
Fast forward to the afternoon before I was to leave for Mexico, to spend a glorious week with my family celebrating the holidays. I got a phone call telling me that my services were no longer needed by my employer. Out of the blue! I mean, being a nanny, you know that your job will eventually have an end date. But, typically, there is some sort of notice before you are cut loose. Not this time. One day I was employed, the next...not so much. Now, fortunately for me, I boarded a plane early the next morning for a tropical paradise, where I was able to let the waves of the ocean wash away the stress of that experience. But even though the stress was tamed, the reality was the same...I was unemployed. (Remember when I was wishing that I didn't have to go to work? BAM! Wish granted!)
I had a wonderful time in Mexico. It was sunny, it was WARM. I got to spend an entire week without shoes on, swimming in the WARM, clear waters of the Pacific ocean. Every night I fell asleep, on the WARM beach, to the soothing roar of the ocean waves. (Are you sensing a theme here?) It was fantastic. On the day that I was leaving, it was 90F outside. When we got on the plane, the pilot was going through his update about the flying conditions and all, and when he got to the info about Minneapolis he said, "Skies are clear in Minneapolis, and the temperature on the ground is...well, let's just say that it is 100 degrees colder than where we just left." NOOOOO! Let me off the plane! I want to go back! Yep, it was the coldest day of the year in Minneapolis, and that was what I was facing upon my return. By the time we landed, it was -15F outside, and quite the shock to my system when I got off the train and started walking to my car. Thankfully, my car started without hesitation, and I was on the final leg of the journey home.
Home. Where my wonderful bed was waiting for me. Home, where I could make myself a cup of tea before heading for bed. Home, where I could see my breath when I was standing in the living room. Home, where my dishes were frozen to the sink. Home, where the water in my toilet was a huge ice cube....WAIT, WHAT?! Yep, my boiler had gone out while I was in paradise, and the temperature inside my house was 22F. Everything in my house was frozen! EVERYTHING! My faucets, my toilet, even the jug of apple cider that was on my kitchen counter. Frozen solid. I had never seen anything like it. Crazy.
Friends to the rescue!
Thanks to my amazing friends, the cavalry descended and helped me figure out what to do in the short term. That included not staying in my house under an electric blanket, but going to Lanie's house for a hot shower to thaw my body, grilled cheese and tomato soup (and mulled wine) to thaw my nerves, and a wonderful warm bed to rest and regroup. The next day I went back to the house to survey the damage and try to figure out what needed to be done. Upon inspection, I found that one of my radiators had a hole in it. Let me say that again....my cast iron radiator had a hole in it...like this:
That was the amount of force the freezing water had on the system! Insane. So I continued looking around and found that another radiator had cracked as well. And, while I was on the phone trying to find a plumber, another one split and started spraying water everywhere. It was like the set of some sort of weird movie, and one of the more bizarre experiences I have had. It felt like my life had frozen, just where it was, and nothing could move. It was strange. I was in limbo. Homeless, jobless, and truly unsure as to what to do next. (Remember when I said that I needed a ton of bricks to fall on my head before I made any major shift in my life? BAM! It fell, comfort zone shattered, changes underway.)
LONG story short, over the next 4 weeks, my house was thawed, more pipes burst, I lived in a hotel, and my house was repaired by some AMAZING technicians. (Shout out to Uptown Plumbing and Heating! They are the BEST!) My boiler, my hot water heater, all of my radiators, and all of the pipes in my basement were replaced. Essentially, my house got a heart transplant, and it is warmer and better than ever. I am back living in my home, and it is like nothing ever happened...and yet everything has changed.
I feel different. I can't really define how, exactly, at least not at the moment. But there is a definite shift and transformation underway, and I am so grateful for that. (Remember when I was wishing that my climb would bring about a major transformation in me? BAM! Delayed reaction...but here it is!)
So stay tuned...more updates soon....I'm so excited to see what is next!
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